I Don't Like Being Lied To | A Question of Integrity

Everyone lies.

I do.

Little white lies to avoid offending someone.

Half-truths to protect my kids.

Silences to shield myself or others.

To be human is to lie.

I accept that.

What I can’t accept is the absence of integrity.

Integrity isn’t about never lying.

It’s about the ongoing effort to live authentically—

to uphold core values,

to operate from a moral framework that treats people with dignity and respect.

It’s about the willingness to face yourself,

and others,

with honesty, humility, and accountability.

And here’s the truth:

Integrity in one area of life does not erase the lack of it in others.

Being honest at work doesn’t excuse betraying your partner.

Generosity with friends doesn’t cancel out cruelty at home.

Doing the “right thing” in public means little if you choose the selfish thing in private—repeatedly.

There is a word for that: Hypocrisy.

That is why I am so disgusted by what happened to me.

A man who presents himself as good—

full of service, discipline, and moral code—

secretly uses and abuses the women who love him.

And when the truth comes out,

he doesn’t repent.

He rewrites the story.

He blames them for it.

He makes them the problem

and himself the victim.

He takes no accountability.

I have no patience for that.

Because it isn’t the slip of a small lie that destroys trust.

It’s the repeated dishonesty without accountability.

It’s the relentless deficit of character that wounds again and again.

It’s the deliberate refusal to take responsibility,

to care about the harm caused,

to repair what’s been broken.

That is what I can’t stand.

Not the flaw of being human,

but the choice to live without integrity and without empathy.

Because lies may be human,

but integrity and empathy are what make us humane.

And I’ll be honest—I have not always been so intentional about my integrity.

I’ve stumbled.

I’ve hidden truths.

I’ve chosen the easier way before.

But I’ve learned, through loss, through love, and through leadership,

that integrity must be chosen on purpose, every day.

And what happened to me bothers me so much

because I am intentional about upholding my integrity.

It is part of who I am—

just like my family.